Moore: Seahawks’ injuries and shaky defense can’t compete with 49ers
I have conversations all the time with myself, and I assume other people do too. Oftentimes it involves an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other. The angel always means well and wants the best for me. The devil is mean-spirited, cynical and burned out. The angel leads me down a good path in life while the devil tempts me into taking foolish detours, hoping for the worst.
Here’s the conversation as it pertains to a prediction on this Sunday’s 49ers-Seahawks game, and if you think this is a stupid writing exercise, the angel does too:
Angel: I really think the Seahawks have an excellent chance to beat the 49ers, win the NFC West and get the No. 1 seed after Green Bay loses to Detroit and New Orleans loses to Carolina.
Devil: Then what?
Angel: They’ll have a bye to get healthy before winning their two home playoff games and going on to beat the Ravens in the Super Bowl.
Devil: And let me guess, Marshawn Lynch will get the ball at the 1-yard line this time and score the game-winning touchdown while grabbing his crotch as he crosses the goal line …
Angel: Aside from the crotch-grabbing, you’re absolutely right!
Devil: So clearly you think stuff like home-field advantage and proving doubters wrong will make up for all of the Seahawks’ injuries and a terrible defense?
Angel: They also have Russell Wilson, who has never lost to the 49ers at home, and a terrific prime time record and …
Devil: … a backup center, a backup left tackle, a backup safety, a third-string tight end, a banged-up Jadeveon Clowney, and come on, girl! Their defense is awful when it’s operating at full strength, and it’s not even close to that now. Clowney will probably be at 50 percent, Shaquill Griffin’s returning from a hamstring injury and won’t be anywhere close to 100 percent, and Lano Hill at safety in place of Quandre Diggs? Please … Did you see him get outrun by Kenyan Drake last week?
Angel: But the return of Beast Mode will give them an emotional lift that will propel them to victory and have people across the country talking about the living legend that is Marshawn Lynch!
Devil: What world are you livin’ in? I don’t care how good he was, he’s not gonna come back after 14 months off and cause another earthquake. Know what’s gonna register on the Richter scale on Sunday? The thumping sound of footsteps from despondent 12’s as they leave the stadium, trying to console themselves by thinking they’ll beat the Eagles next week. They all live in your make-believe world too!
Angel: Why do you have to be such a downer all the time? That’s no way to live your life. Leave Jim alone. He’s a good man. He’s trying to do his best and you always get in his way.
Devil: Leave Jim alone? What? He’d be bored stiff hanging out with you. Remember that one time he went to Longacres with his buddies, and they bet on the wrong ponies and drank too much, and you were telling him to call it a night and go home?
Angel: Yes, of course, and he didn’t listen to me.
Devil: That’s right, girl! He heard me loud and clear! I told him to get on a plane to Reno and win back what he lost at the track at the casinos!
Angel: He’s always wrong when he listens to you. Jim lost more money in Reno, and his wife was really mad when he finally got home the next day. It was a dumb move on his part, and sometimes I wonder if he’ll ever learn.
Devil: I guess you do know something about dumb moves since you’re taking the Seahawks to beat the 49ers, apparently overlooking other factors such as George Kittle torching the middle of that Seahawks’ defense while the 49ers’ pass rush buries Wilson.
Angel: Jim’s a smart man. He’s a strong believer in Human Nature. Intangibles led him to pick the Cardinals to win last week, and a lot of those things favor the Seahawks this week. I know he’ll make the right choice.
Devil: He ain’t smart, but he’s not an idiot either.
Prediction: 49ers 31, Seahawks 20